Broken records

Sometimes I look at the  “This is Fine” and think about how many times I find myself in the same situation.  That dog is me, hot coffee and everything.  I sit there, I can feel the house burning, but I stay sitting there.  All bug eyed. Affirming that I am O-K. Fine. Obviously the dog is not fine.05onfire1_xp-facebookJumbo

And neither am I in most situations. Most recently, my parents were arguing about something minor. Most times, I sit through their arguing and disassociate myself from the situation. I space out. I distract myself by browsing the web. My head begins to hurt when the doors start slamming. But I still sit there.

Every day as a self challenge, I’m gonna react more quickly to not letting myself just be in uncomfortable and abusive situations. It’s a real struggle to get up and walk away but I have to. I think the first step is acting on my self awareness of how I’m feeling in any given situation. Usually my body gives me a sign that its either time to fight or fly the fuck out the there. The next step is to get up and leave, and take care of my needs first.

 

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